Recently, my wife Charlene has showed a subtle, but ever so noticeable, increased interest in the band Coldplay. For instance, “Hey, Coldplay is on Letterman tonight.” or “We could watch ‘Saturday Night Live.’  Coldplay is the musical guest.”  Things that make you go hmmm.  I must admit, I understand.  Lead singer Chris Martin does appear to have it all going on.  The looks, the voice, the rock star mystic.  Fine.  Watch all you want honey, I won’t get in the way.

Well, a few weeks ago the new issue of “Us Weekly” arrived in the mail. Let me first explain that we have never subscribed to “Us Weekly,” one day it just started arriving in the mail.  Honest.  Then a few months later, they asked us to renew our subscription.  I ignored the request and for some reason, “Us Weekly” keeps arriving.  Oh well, you know I cannot get enough celebrity gossip (note sarcasm).  I especially like how “Us Weekly” makes me feel extra old, since the oldest age of any celebrity pictured is usually a few years younger than me and I don’t know half of the celebrities, in the first place.  There, I am a grumpy old man.  I guess that must be the target audience for a free “Us Weekly” subscription.  Sorry, back on track.  Well, the new issue of “Us Weekly” arrived in the mail and I discovered that Chris Martin (age 37) of Coldplay has started dating Jennifer Lawrence (age 24), after splitting up with Gwyneth Paltrow (age 41).  Okay, first off, if it had not been for Charlene’s unusual interest in Coldplay, the article would not have been on my radar.  I probably would have skipped to the movie reviews, but since Mr. Martin seems to be of interest to Charlene, I put myself in his shoes.  In his breakup and rebound, his actress (Shakespeare in) love interest became seventeen years younger.

Glancing over at my wife, I asked, “Isn’t it kind of wrong that Chris Martin is dating Jennifer Lawrence? She is so much younger.”

My wife, who continued reading the paper, gave sort of a shrug. Passive approval of the Martin – Lawrence romance.

Foolishly, I continued, “I mean, if something happened to you, would you be okay with me dating Jennifer Lawrence?”

My wife. My poor, poor, wife then could barely contain her mocking (jay) laughter, “You?  Dating Jennifer Lawrence?”  [Insert more “wife chuckling” (term patent pending).]

Okay, okay, I get it. Point made.  No need to linger on the subject.  I guess that I deserved that response, because in that moment, my wife appeared to be a shooting star “in a sky, in a sky full of stars.”