Sitting in a conference call at work.  Discussing agreement provisions with a vendor.  Considering inflation provisions in Years Three and Four of the contract.  What better time for a Federal Reserve joke?  That’s what I thought.  Subtly and without warning, I inserted the name “Janet Yellen” into the conversation.  Stunned silence, followed by a halted chuckle or two.  It’s always hard to know when it’s appropriate to laugh at a train wreck.

Saddened by my pitiful joke, I slinked back to my cubicle.  That’s when I remembered earlier in the day.  Yes, on one of my trips back and forth to the copy room.  I got a little excited.  It was after all “Potluck Day” in the office and the copy room was full of all sorts of goodies.  What better reason to make lots of copies in lots of different trips to the copy room?  Well, on one particular trip, I made a sudden turn.  Too sudden.  Never before have I moved so quickly to rush out of my cubicle.  At that very instance, I spotted a new worker in the office walking by my cube.  I swerved to the right and my shoulder rammed into the outside wall of my cubicle.  I heard the sound of office furniture screaming in agony and I feared the worst.  What if all the cubicles fell like dominos?  A disastrous chain reaction.  Fortunately however the furniture manufacturer had considered imbeciles such as me, when designing their cubicles.  The wall popped out at an angle (I’m guessing about 30 degrees).  Shocked at my handiwork, I apologized several times to my new coworker, who I’m sure was very impressed.  I could not worry about that however.  I had no time.  I had other things to consider.  Pushing my office back into place, I realized that the thought of free food in the copy room had caused me to become somewhat unstable.  It also appeared to give me superhuman strength.  All of this comforts me in a time of punchlessness.  In the time of a failed “Janet Yellen” joke.  After all, her name’s “Janet Yellen” and not “Janet Laughin.”  #CannotStopMyself  #MaybeThePotLuckIsToBlame