For the last two weeks (and what seems like has been an eternity), I have been fighting various ailments.  In an effort to kill the viruses once and for all time, I enlisted a variety of techniques, which include two that are best done in private.  No worries, they are eye drops and gargling with salt water.  I know they sound weird, but trust me, anything is worth it to be well again.  Well, almost anything.

The primary problem has been finding an acceptable place at work to administer my treatments.  Sure, I could put in the eye drops in my cubicle, but my co-workers have really suffered enough.  Next best option, especially for the salt water gargling, which by the way does a great job at soothing a sore throat and also gives you the breath of a castaway, is the handicap accessible bathroom down the hall.  For some reason however, it always seems to be occupied.  Ugh, probably some co-worker trying to escape exposure to my plague.  Double ugh.

Given that even the briefest use of the “Nursing Mothers” room would be frowned upon and also the absolute worst place for me to be bringing my non-contagious, but suspect of sickness self, the only place left is the public rest room.  In a stall or by the sinks.  Ugh and yuck, either way.

So there I am extending my elbows up beyond the privacy barriers, while I put in my eye drops.  Probably an odd enough thing to see when entering the bathroom.  Then I wait until I think I am alone for the gargle treatment.  I’m probably alone, because someone reaches for the door and hears a loud throat bubbling noise and heads toward the handicap restroom.  Sorry buddy, it’s probably occupied.