Yesterday, it was really windy outside.  As I went out to pickup after Kirby the Beagle, I pulled some plastic grocery store sacks out of my pocket and waft, one lifted into the neighbor’s tree.

As I contemplated this dilemma, no good alternatives presented themselves.  I could try to get up on a ladder and free the bag with a rack.  Success, highly unlikely.  Risk of injury, 90%.  I could purchase an extendable tree branch clipper thingy.  Success, highly likely.  Cost, too high until all other options have been exhausted.  Talk to our neighbor.  Please, we live in the suburbs.  ‘Nuff said.  I could wait years and years for the sun and rain to gradually decompose the bag.  Okay, I’ll work with that one, until I figure out a better alternative.

Ugh, just a few more precious feet and the bag would have entered low Earth orbit.  So close and yet, so far.

Stopping by the grocery store to pick up some dinner, I swung by the beer store.  Standing in line, I was still contemplating the “Bag Situation.”  I overheard the guys behind the counter debating if Cal Ripken’s consecutive games streak would ever be broken.  Getting up to the counter, the cashier asked me, “So what sports record do you think will never be broken?”

I paused and reflected on the question.  Ah, a rare pause for me.  Probably an attempt by my brain to free some RAM from the “Bag Situation” and contemplate the new question.  One of the great questions of our time.  A question right in my wheelhouse.  As I thought, the cashier suggested, “Maybe DiMaggio’s hit streak?”  Stop it, Rookie.  I steeled myself.  I would not be distracted, especially when something so important was being discussed.

Boom!  The answer crashed into my consciousness, “Cy Young’s career wins total of 511.  Only one other pitcher even has more than 400.”  It’s a long drive!  Say goodbye!  Walk off answer!

Gentlemen, carry on.  My work here is done.  A moment of glory, regardless of the plastic bag still swaying in the breeze.