Today at work, my friend Robb from the Budget Department approached my desk.  He had disturbing news for me.

Addressing me, as well as my cube neighbor Lisa, Robb said with a smile, “You and Lisa were in my dream last night.” At that point, I abandoned my computer and ran for the lock down room.  No seriously, I gave him a confused stare, as he continued.

“I was eating lunch and you two came up and started bullying me.” The details were thankfully sketchy, but one thing that Robb remembered for sure was that he was shocked that we were being so mean.

I was saddened.  Really, what were we doing?  How had we changed from mild mannered, fun loving management analyst problem solvers into REM jerks?  Did my bizzaro self somehow turn my friend Lisa bad, as well?  Is it a deeply buried subconscious office understanding that someday our spreadsheets will make us snap and we will become nasty bureaucrats, who will apparently not hesitate to take a co-worker’s lunch?  How powerful is my demon Id that it torments others in their sleep?  What had I become?

On the other hand, perhaps this was a gift.  A gift to myself and society.  Yes, if you see me in the flesh, smile and say “hello.” I am a nice guy.  We could go get a cup of coffee.

When you close your eyes, however, take heed.  Be alert. Get ready to run, because in your sleepy brain, I am a real punk and I got a gang in tow.  So, if you know what is best for you, drop that 3AM Lunchables and run to your next nightmare, because my evil dream time doppelganger is coming and he has a beef with you.