This Fall, our 13-year-old son Jacob is playing for the neighboring community’s baseball team.  As a result, all of my green Cottage Grove Wolfpack apparel does not do me a lick of good, when cheering for his new team the Woodbury Royals, who of course wear royal blue.  What to do?  What to do?

Well, digging through my box of baseball hats (every man should have a box full of baseball caps, very American and all that), I found one that fit the bill.  It was a fitted white ball cap with a blue “W.”  I had purchased it several years ago, when I was interviewing for a community that started with the letter “W.”  I thought it would pump me up  for the interview or something.  Hey, it did not work and I did not get the job, but it landed me a nice baseball cap.  A fine addition to my hat box.

I put on the hat, proud that I had solved my dilemma.  Only one problem, the fitted 7 5/8 inch hat no longer fit.  It was too small.  What?  How does a fully grown man get a bigger head?  It was not like it was just snug, because I needed a haircut, it really was too small now.  I now had a bigger head (note, I avoided the term “Big Head” and you should too).

Even worse, the hat had a cooler story to it.  The “W” hat was a replica from the uniform worn the only year that Hall of Fame pitcher Walter Johnson won a World Series championship with the usually dreadful Washington Senators.  Cool, huh?  Well, not when your head apparently grew another 1/4 inch and the hat no longer fits.  Ugh.

Asking my son Jacob how the hat looked on me, his face told the story.  Not good.  His face kind of grimaced and he remarked, “It makes you look old.”  Dear God, my head grew and it makes me look old!  Farewell “W” hat, you may have served Walter Johnson well, but me oh my, I never wanted to be his contemporary.  Especially one with a big head (there, I said it, happy?).

Squeeze your big head into that hat, Grandpa Dave.  You can do it!