Mowing my lawn over my lunch hour and then needing to go over it a second time, I reflected upon one of my missed opportunities of the summer…

A few weeks ago, I needed to get my cordless screwdriver for work (don’t ask), I decided to drop by home and sneak into the garage, so as not to disrupt the delicate balance of child happiness at home, grab the cordless screwdriver and head on my happy way.

Opening the garage, I went in, grabbed the screwdriver, got back into the car, and I was off. No harm, no foul.

About two minutes later, my phone vibrated. A text. Charlene requesting that I get home immediately.

“Was something wrong?” – my first thought.

Seconds later, another text. Charlene thought someone may have stolen the mower out of the garage.

“Oh no, a burglar!” – my second thought.

“The mower was stolen!” – third thought.

“Good, I always hated that mower.” – fourth thought.

“Especially, since I ran over one of its tires with my car and it started mowing crooked.” – fifth thought.

“Hey, wait a second, after that I moved it to the shed.” – sixth thought, interrupted by another text from Charlene. She was onto me and now suspected that I had snuck into the garage and inadvertently creeped her out.

Strike one – the broken lawn mower had not been stolen.

Strike two – no promising career as a cat burglar in my future.

Strike three – husband accidently creeping out wife.

At least I had my cordless screwdriver and could head back to work (remember (sigh…), don’t ask).