Last Fall, our 3rd Grader Sam won a can of pop in class. I forget what he answered correctly or did, but oh was he proud. The reason we have forgotten was because it was so long ago. The problem is that Sam does not drink pop, but he was so proud and he insisted on keeping it cold in the refrigerator, in the event that he decided to ever celebrate his success.
Time passed. The soda remained. We moved. The soda moved with us. Leftovers were purged. The soda survived.
Last week, Sam was surveying the fridge for a snack and saw his prize soda. Looking on the bottom of the can, he saw a “Best By” date of May 26. Gasp! The sacred prize soda was about to spoil. We tried explaining to Sam that the “Best By” date was not an “Expiration Date” and that if he drank it by the end of May, he would be fine. Sam sort of believed us.
Behold, the dreaded “Best By” date.
Earlier tonight, as bedtime approached, Sam remembered his beverage with a sense of urgency. It was May 31, tomorrow was June. Not only would the beverage pass its May 26 “Best By” date, it was about to exceed its extension. Obviously only one solution remained, finish the beloved drink.
Telling Sam to sit at the counter, he cradled his prize. Opening the can, he looked at me and asked, “Would you like the first drink?” Wow! What a great honor. Thank you, Sam. As I finished my sip, Sam eyed me closely, “How was it?” That’s when it struck me. This was no honor, Sam had me perform the role of royal taster. If I survived the “Best By” expired beverage, he would then partake. Well son, no need to worry, your old man will live another day, even though I have long exceeded my “Best By” date.
“Grapette,” which I believe is also known as the “Finest Name in Generic Soda.”