Bobblehead definitions…

1) A figurine toy that has a jiggly head on a spring.  Also called a nodder.

2) Sleepy me driving home after work.  Also called a nodder.

As I exited the grocery store, everything looked normal.

Then I looked closer…

Oh dear, looks like those Double Decker Shopping Carts are not to be trusted.  It appears as if they have a wild side and yearn to roam free.  You’ve been warned.

Pursuit of happiness?  Found it!

When you see your wife relaxed and yummy,

your kids happily at play,

you forget about Independence,

because you are so content in a dependent sort of way.

When you wake up and it appears as if the sun has doubled…

…you know it’s gonna be a hot one.

Irrational Fear – My wedding ring will fly off into deep blue depths, anytime I go swimming.

Unwelcome Reality – The Jaws of Life and the entire storage room of a Bath and Body Works is required to get my ring off.

Bad Pitch – The pitch that got away from me and hit my son on the bum.

Good Decision – Son, wise choice not to rush the mound.

Ugly Forever – How my single wayward pitch shall become part of family lore.

What would be the first clue that a holiday weekend is upon us?

Lonely car.  Such a lonely car.

I was going to have fun with my 10-year-old son Sam and I could hardly wait.

I called Sam over and said, “Liquid.”  A big smile flashed across my face.

Sam, a little confused, responded with a quiet, “What?”

“Liquid,” I repeated.

Still confused, Sam answered with hesitation, “Water?”

“Sam,” I said a bit exasperated, “earlier today you said that ‘Liquid’ was one of your least favorite words.”

Sam, even more confused now, “No.”

Me, desperate to avoid the group of confusion, “If is wasn’t ‘Liquid,’ then what was it?”

Sam briefly thought before suddenly grinning and a clarifying answer, “It was ‘Juices.’  Ewww, I hate the word ‘Juices.'”

Sadly, I was somewhat right, but only in a “Dad” sort of way, which in my case is just right.

Thank you, Auto Correct.  You knew just what I needed.  Typing a venting text to my wife.  Releasing stress from a blunder filled night.  I reference frustrations.  I click send.

That’s when I realize that Auto Correct came to the rescue.  Auto Correct saved the day.  Yes, it was not very fond of my vent.  Not very fond of my “Grrrr” and that’s when it decided to take actions into its own microprocessor hands.  That’s when it turned “Grrrr” into “Ferret.”

Smile.  Must have been an angst ridden ferret.  Steer clear of him.  Thanks for the warning, Auto Correct.