All posts by Dave Paulsen

Life is simple. Love God, neighbor, baseball, and cookies.

Chill after the Spill

Our 6-year-old son Ben is going through a squirrelly phase at dinner time.  He would much rather tell stories, squirm around in his chair, laugh at jokes, and generally be disruptive, rather than even think of eating dinner.  This would explain his scarecrow-like physic.  Tonight, we ate outside and Ben happened to be sitting on my left.  As the scarecrow boy squirmed to and fro, I paid little attention and concentrated on my food.

Turns out, I was also sitting slightly downhill, because during dinner I heard a soft crash.  Looking to my left, I saw a cascade of milk traveling toward my plate.  Soon it traveled around my plate and spilled onto the deck to my right.  Tiny drops landed on my leg, as a steady stream of 2% splashed on the deck’s wood.

Watching the commotion, as everyone else at the table convinced Ben to finally head toward the kitchen for paper towels, I surprised myself.  I did not jump up to help.  I did not scurry to grab towels.  I resisted all temptation to fix the problem.  I let my child take ownership.  I let him fix the problem.  This would appear to some as inaction or an uncaring stance, but au contraire, this had been a huge step forward for me.  I was actually doing the right thing.  Not overreacting, but rather being calm.  Almost sedate.

Maybe my years of parenting have mellowed me.  Maybe it was the spill proof deck.  Maybe it was the cool summer breeze.  Regardless, I now realize that upon reaching the “Age of Milk Spill” with my third child, I had embodied a new state.  A strange new calm.  Somewhat chill.  Which by the way is an appropriate temperature for 2% milk.

 

“Cookie Cups” – Cookie of the Week (06/28/15)

Cookie Cups

COOKIE CUPS

“I had previously heard the ‘Legend of the Cookie Cup,’ a cookie so incredible that you could drink milk from it.  I had my dream, but I had to be patient.  I needed to wait until I had the right tools.  Then came last Sunday, Father’s Day.  There waiting for me, a gift beyond measure.  A popover pan, the last tool needed to realize Cookie Cup magic.  I went to work.  Methodical.  Measured.  Taking each step one at a time.  Then…  behold!  A dream realized.  The Holy Grail of Cookies within my grasp.  The Cookie Cup was mine!

This cookie is a delightful mixture of chocolate chip and shortbread, which creates the perfect vessel for holding milk.  Take a sip.  Take a bite.  Repeat.  Enjoy.  Note that this recipe creates six very substantial cookies, so save room for dessert.”

 

Cookie Cup Ingredients

1 cup Shortening

½ cup Brown Sugar

1/3 cup Sugar

1 Egg Yolk

2 teaspoons Vanilla Extract

2 cup Flour

½ teaspoon Salt

1 cup Mini Chocolate Chips

 

Lining Ingredients

1/2 cup Chocolate Chips

1 Tablespoon Shortening

 

Filling Ingredient

Milk (cold, of course…  don’t forget the milk)

 

Cream the shortening and brown sugar.

Mix in the egg yolk and vanilla extract.

Mix in the flour and salt.

Stir in the mini chocolate chips.

Grease a 6 cup popover pan.

Push the dough to the interior sides of each popover cup.  The dough should be at least ¼ inch thick along the sides and bottom of each tin.

Chill in refrigerator for 30 minutes to allow dough to set.

Preheat oven to 350 degrees.

Bake for 20 minutes.

Allow cookie cups to rest in the popover pan on a cooling rack for 20 minutes.  It is important to let the cookie cups cool in the popover pan or else they will crumble upon removal.  Don’t worry, once cooled for 20 minutes, they leave their tin just fine.

Melt together the chocolate chips and shortening by microwaving for 30 seconds and alternating with stirring, until just melted.

Remove the cookie cups from their popover tins.

Fill each cookie cup about ½ way full with the melted lining chocolate.

Swirl the chocolate around the interior of the cookie cup until their interior is completely lined with chocolate.  This chocolate lining will enable the cookie cup to hold milk without falling apart.

Pour out the excess chocolate from the interior of each cookie cup.

Place in refrigerator to set for 20 minutes.

Fill your cookie cups with cold milk and enjoy!

 

Makes 6 cookie cups.

Revised Source:  “Milk & Cookie Shots” by Pop Sugar Food, as seen on YouTube #EatTheTrend

Special Thank You to James Carlin and Lisa Morgan Gessner, who both encouraged me to embark on my quest for the Holy Grail of Cookies…  the Legendary Cookie Cup.

Family with Cookie Cups

A family that drinks milk from cookie cups together (each with their own individual cookie cup and not one large cookie cup shared by all), stays together.

Joy of my Boy

Feet up and relaxing, while the lawn is being mowed.  Ah, the benefits of having a tweenager around the house (and two youngsters, who will soon join the lawn mowing ranks).  #FinallyTheWaySummerShouldBe

Feet Up and Lawn Mowed “Mow faster, boy.  Faster!”  #taskmaster

String Cheese Poem Tribute

It’s a lovely summer evening.  Perfect for sitting on the back deck, enjoying a glass of red wine, and listening to some classic poetry.

So sit back and enjoy the video tribute…

 

Click here for String Cheese video magic.

 

“String Cheese” by Dave Paulsen (circa 1989)

You think you’re so smart

Shedding your skin like a cylindrical reptile

Take heed though little dairy product

Your changes are numbered

 

Author’s Note:  besides becoming an instant classic at my late ‘80s high school lunch table, “String Cheese” was also winner of the 2013 Willmar Public Library “Potweet Contest.”

Okay, you were so good sitting through that and the night is so lovely, here’s another poem.  Fresh off the presses, just authored.  Reflect on the quality, marvel at the genius.

 

“Lost Leaf” by Dave Paulsen (approximately 6:30PM)

Leaf on my keyboard

on a warm summer night

Leaf on my keyboard

such a natural delight

Leaf on my Keyboard

Well folks, you’ve suffered through enough, but I have one more treat for you.  This evening was apparently so romantic that Batman was moved to finally propose to Wonder Woman.  Special thanks to my 8-year-old son Sam for arranging this timeless romantic encounter.

Batman Proposing

Final Author’s Note:  please, excuse Batman kneeling on a McDonald’s French Fry Transformer.  He was so moved by the moment that he had trouble keeping his balance, I think we can all relate.

Goodnight and may you find inspiration (no matter how silly) in the warm gentle breezes of summer.

Vile Weed Revisited

I have never liked asparagus.  I’m not sure why, oh wait, I do, it’s nasty.  There, I said it.  It’s out of my system.  I am an asparagus hater.  As the character Newman on “Seinfeld” once said, “Vile weed!” (sure it was in reference to broccoli, but the term is still applicable).

Well (awkward literary transition), I have been trying to be really good and watch what I eat and the best way to do that is allow my wife, who has a great deal of self-control, to select some healthy foods for me, a husband with very little to no self-control.  So (second awkward literary transition in the same paragraph, way to go, Dave), I had a meeting and figured I would allow Charlene to pick out something healthy for me to eat on the way.  Heading toward the refrigerator, I saw my wife emerge (she was not actually in the refrigerator…  poor choice of wording to complement the awkward transitions) with a Tupperware container in her hand.  Then she opened the container to reveal (gasp!) a homemade asparagus salad.  Looking into my eyes, she waited for my rejection.  “Be strong, Dave.  You can do it.”  Without the utterance of a single disparaging word about the most nasty vegetable known to man, I accepted the salad, along with a fruit yogurt, which I hoped would later cleanse my palate.

Driving to my meeting, I popped open the Tupperware and eyed the salad.  Staring right back at me, my adversary, the “vile weed!”  I will not eat it Sam I am, I will not eat asparagus-am.  Well, you get the idea.  Any who (way to go, another awkward literary transition, you are watching something special here folks), I considered if I could fling the asparagus chunks one-by-one out onto the state highway, as I sped along, when something strange happened.  Something deep inside me said, “Dave, it is wrong to fling part of your wife’s homemade salad out the window.  She worked hard to make this.  Don’t be a complete jerk.”  Then against all odds and listening to my inner “good husband,” I took a bite.  And (shock!), it was not half bad.  In fact, whatever she did to that asparagus made it edible and that is saying something.  In fact, it was pretty tasty.

I took another bite.  Then another.  Before I knew it, I was driving along gobbling up the asparagus salad, which by the way does not lend to the best driving technique, but it does create a healthy lunch.  My long-time foe had become somewhat likable.  Even, dare I say, enjoyable?  Maybe it was the dietary hunger pains, maybe it was the inner voice, most likely it was my wife’s amazing cooking, whatever it was something unprecedented had occurred.  For one single moment, for one magical dish, I had enjoyed asparagus, let’s just not make a habit of it.

 

Mascot Dream Fulfilled

Now, I can die a happy man.  Not only did I fulfill the dream of being a real live mascot, but now I can say with pride…

Livin' the Bean

“I’m livin’ the bean.”

and

Bean there

“Bean there, done that.”

Yes, as of tonight, I have lived a full life.  And now, thanks to the Willmar Stingers Baseball Club and sports intern extraordinaire Ethan Price, I can say with absolute certainty, “There ain’t no joy, like being a soy, bean that is.”

 

“Lemon Meringues” – Father’s Day Edition Cookie of the Week (06/22/15)

Lemon Meringue

LEMON MERINGUES

“My dad’s favorite desert was Lemon Meringue pie.  Well to remember Dad on Father’s Day, I whipped up a batch of tribute ‘Lemon Meringues.’  Light and airy, these cookies also feature a smooth lemon flavor.  ‘Lemon Meringue Cookies’ just the right size, when a pie is too big.”

 

2 Egg Whites

¼ teaspoon Cream of Tartar

¼ teaspoon Salt

2/3 cup Sugar

1 teaspoon Lemon Zest

1 teaspoon Vanilla Extract

¼ teaspoon Lemon Extract

 

Preheat oven to 200 degrees.

Whisk eggs until frothy.

Whisk in Cream of Tartar and salt.

Whisk some more.

Very gradually, whisk in the sugar.

Whisk a lot more until stiff peaks form.

Whisk some more just to be sure.

Did I mention that these cookies need plenty of whisking and then a little more?

Drop Tablespoon sized lumps of “dough” onto parchment paper lined baking sheets.

Bake for 2 hours.  That’s right, 2 hours.  Don’t start these late at night.

 

Makes about 28 cookies.

Revised Source:  “Double Lemon Meringue Cookies” recipe on RealHouseMoms.com.