I have a pair of exercise shorts that for some reason tend to (well, how shall we put this) drift down in the back.  Yes, without any emergency response, these shorts tend to head South.  Otherwise, they are fine shorts and as a result, they have stayed in the rotation, but this is (well, how shall we put this) a butt problem.

Earlier today, I was playing basketball with the boys.  Not a care in the world and my absentminded shorts snug around my hind quarters.  I went up for a shot and all of a sudden my kids reacted with a mix of shock and horror.  Apparently, as one of my boys later summarized the situation, “As Dad went up, his shorts went down.”

Embarrassed by the  whole ordeal, I tightened the drawstring around my waist and agreed that if it ever happened again, it would be a technical foul.  Indeed, technically nasty and disgustingly foul.

Damaging the eyes of my children with that vision should be reason enough for those shorts to head to Goodwill.  There is however something to be said for the tactical advantage they provide me on the basketball court.  It’s hard to defend against a guy, when you have been blinded by a full moon.