Wednesday, August 5, 2015.

Breaking News from the Kandiyohi County Fair…

Blue Ribbon!

Man, Mixer, Mission Accomplished!

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[Original Mission…  September 2014]

What is the Mission? What is the next step for Cookie Dave? Well to answer that, let me explain how I got to this point.

Way back when, we lived in Kansas. In Kansas, I began to bake cookies. Then I began entering them into the County Fair and I was blessed enough to take home the Blue Ribbon in the Cookie Jar competition (i.e. cookie medley contest) two years in a row. Bolstered by my success at the County Fair, I decided to step it up a notch and enter the State Fair. Upon entering the Major Leagues of cookie baking (i.e. the State Fair), I was thumped. I mean I was crushed. I mean I was decimated. It was not even close. The next year, the same thing. Dismantled. Embarrassed. Sent packing. The third year, you can guess. Another epic defeat. To make matters worse, the State Fair judges (unlike the County Fair judges) have no soul. I mean to say that their essence has been darkened to the point where the sun will never shine on a positive comment from their lips. Some would say blunt. I say evil. You can say things in a constructive fashion without being hurtful (i.e. the County Fair judges), well the State Fair judges have never been introduced to the concept of kindness. If they don’t like a cookie, they’ll tell you and they’ll also tell you off for free. No charge. For example, at one point, I had entered a “Pumpkin Pie Bar” (note that bars are classified as a type of cookie for the Fair), which the State Fair judges declared, “This is not a cookie!” Well, the cookie cookbook I got the recipe from begs to differ, you all high and mighty judges. Ugh. Disgust.

To make matters worse, there was a lock on First Place at the State Fair. Two women would exchange the title year, after year, after bloody year (you are prohibited from winning two years in a row). For, try this on for size, fifteen years in a row! Insane. Greedy. Borderline unethical.

So there I was, embittered, discouraged, in the cookie dumps. I was however a two-time County Fair champ and I figured I would give the State Fair another try. After pulling out all the stops, I finally placed Second. The dastardly twosome still had a lock on First, but I had proved myself in their league. I had taken home the Red Ribbon. Reflecting on the depths from which I had risen, I vowed never to be selfish with a Cookie Title. If I proved I could repeat, I would step down. Give someone else a chance to taste victory, then I would see if I could comeback the next year and regain the title. Competition, not dominance. I wanted to be something new, something different, a likable dynasty.

Before the next Kansas State Fair, we moved to Minnesota, which has a fine State Fair, but no Cookie Jar category and no Cookie Medley contest to be found. My glory would be found in my new home, Kandiyohi County. The first fair, I waited patiently on the sidelines. Observing. Strategizing. Borderline spying. What did I find? Another bit of cookie dominance. A talented woman, who had won the Kandiyohi County Fair Cookie Jar competition six years in a row. Another big fish in a small pond. A worthy adversary. The second year, I entered and tied for first place with (you guessed it) the woman who had extended her Blue Ribbon streak to seven years. Standing in the Foods Building, I stared at our jars and considered ways I could clinch a sole title. While devising a strategy, I commented to the Fair volunteer next to me what a nice jar had been submitted by the Second Place finisher (she used an Olympic theme for her jar and even featured a battery operated torch). The Fair volunteer pointed to a young woman in the room and indicated that she was the Second Place finisher, who had entered in her first year of eligibility as… an adult. Ugh. I was now the Old Contestant. The Old Dog unwilling to let young blood take the throne. I was becoming a bully in the Fair Cookie Jar competition. A little bothered by my status as an elder cookie statesman, I figured it would be okay to try for a repeat. Two in a row is not greedy. Just proving to myself and the world that I can still do it.

As luck and dare I say, without sounding far too cookie conceited, skill would have it, I took home a sole first place victory the next year. I had proven myself a worthy champion. The seven time winner had slipped to third place, but there in second was the same young woman. I was beginning to appear as a greedy old cookie baking man, unwilling to let someone else taste cookie glory. My cookie baking reputation would not be tarnished. I would prove myself benevolent. A kind soul. A seasoned competitor willing to share the throne.

So this year, I sat out the Fair, and this week, I saw the seeds of my kindness take life. The twice second place finisher took home the Blue Ribbon. A new champion had been born, which brings me full circle to my Mission. My next step. It is time to start a comeback. Time to regain that eye of the tiger. Time to step into the ring and take another swing. With every cookie I bake. With every oven I preheat. With every egg I crack. I will have one goal in mind. One passion. One Mission. Take back the Blue Ribbon at the Fair. Watch out, County Fair 2015. Cookie Dave is on the comeback trail.