My lunch bag died. A full blown zipper blowout. No saving it. The bag was dead.

At home, I was paired up with a long neglected lunch bag from the depths of a closet. How many days did it sit in the dark, just waiting for its day to carry my midday nourishment? Well, that day has come.

Picking it up, I examined my new workplace companion. Then I remembered why it had been banished to the back of the closet. The bag has a vertical design. Tall and skinny. Good for a fashion model, bad for a lunch bag. Especially a lunch bag living in a home with horizontally oriented Tupperware.

Now a dilemma awaits. Fight the bag’s orientation and stuff Tupperware down into that bad boy, until it bursts. The other option is to place the bag on its side and pretend that it’s horizontally inclined. This of course will require ignoring its vertical handle and carrying it like a football. Always fear would surround me. Fear that I would forget and grab the handle, lift the bag, and have all of the horizontally oriented food placed on their side. My salads would sadly slide to a scrambled end.

Scrambled. Good for egg. Bad for my lunch.