[In the following post, the names have been withheld to protect the innocent.  Now that the historical record has been protected, we can proceed.]

I was feeling pretty good.  Conferences yielded great feedback.  The boys scored high in math and reading.  All was well on the education front.  Sleep well tonight, dad.  No worries.  Good parenting.  Keep those healthy breakfasts coming.  Keep those young brains a growin’.

Then came Family Trivial Pursuit Night.

Question (paraphrased) – “What young Jewish girl authored a famous diary during Nazi occupation of the Netherlands?”

Obviously not knowing the answer, my son guessed with a shrug, “Larry Smith?”  Really?  Larry Smith?  What young Jewish girl in the 1940s was named Larry Smith?  I bet not a single one!  It isn’t even a good alias for someone in hiding.  How about Esther?  Ruth?  Any girl name!  Oh, I know.  How about Anne?  Maybe even Frank Smith.  That would have been closer.  Larry Smith?  Ugh.

Question (to a different child, who also did very well at conferences) – “What war took place during Abraham Lincoln’s presidency?”

Confident, my son answered, “Civil War II.”  Dear God!  Really?  Civil War II?  Sure, war sequels get confusing.  World War this, World War that, but the Civil War was one and done.

The conference results said that their math and ready scores were exceptional.  Absent, any mention of Social Studies.