At some point in time, I do not recall when, the preparation of Instant Oatmeal became an overly complicated process.

Step 1) Me:  “(Name a child, any child), what flavor of instant oatmeal would you like?”

Step 2) After what seems like 20 minutes of intense reflection, while staring at the cupboard…  “Peach.”  It’s always peach.

Step 3) Combine packet contents with ½ cup milk (not water, because I go all out).

Step 4) Microwave for 2 minutes, while I conduct a multitude of other errands for my children, including hearing them complain about what is going to be served for school lunch (#CryMeaRiver), but answer that they have procrastinated so long with breakfast that I no longer have time to pack them a lunch.

Step 5) Spoon the now piping hot peach oatmeal (also contains “Cream” in the title, because “Peaches and Cream” sounds so much yummier) into a new bowl so that the bowl it is served in is not hotter than the sun, because there is no time to wait for the bowl to cool off, since they procrastinated so long in getting breakfast started.

Step 6) – Only for 6-year-old Ben – Place newly filled bowl of peach oatmeal into the freezer for exactly 2 minutes to ensure that in no way could the peach oatmeal ever be classified as scalding hot and is now lukewarm at best.

Well this morning, I inadvertently mixed things up a tad.  During Step 5, as I used an oven mitt to hold the hot bowl, while spatulaing (new word, patent pending) the contents into the room temperature bowl, I lifted my newly oven mitt covered hand too quickly.  This rapid action lifted the fabric belt of my bathrobe high into the air.  Then in a whip like fashion the belt ends landed in the peach (and creamy) oatmeal.  “Thwhack!  Thwhack!”

Pulling the peach oatmeal covered belt from the bowl, I served the delicious not-so-piping hot cereal to my child.  What happens in the kitchen, stays in the kitchen.  #WordstoLiveBy